It’s Never Too Late to Improve Your Relationship

By the time we are in a relationship most of us are pretty good at navigating life. We have probably achieved some sort of successes with school or jobs and just the ability to accomplish things in life.

So when we finally connect to the person we fall in love with, why is it that so many of us feel as if we can’t figure out how to fix simple things, like misunderstandings and disagreements? If we as humans are good at other things in our lives; taking care of people, working, going to class, why do we fail at simple things like getting along with another person?

Annoying girlfriend, boyfriend, or spouse getting on your nerves? There are peaceful, loving, productive ways to deal with it. This article examines some of those ways, and also some of what not to do.

All of us sometimes in our lives get annoyed with people we love. It’s only normal that when humans interact in close quarters they are inevitably going to get on each other’s nerves. And in relationships this annoyance can happen regularly. In fact in many relationships it does.

Humans are funny beings. We are extremely well equipped to tell instantly when something doesn’t feel right. We know immediately when we don’t like something. And we are experts at understanding what we need to stop when something bothers us so we can feel better.

We use these skills almost automatically, especially when we are in a relationship. We are the first ones to tell our partner, the one person we love the most, exactly what we don’t like about what they do or didn’t do.

It would be helpful if all of us in relationships knew exactly what love is supposed to feel like. If we knew, then we would know if we were in love or if we weren’t. We wouldn’t wonder about it. As a couples specialist I work with a lot of people in relationships who are often not sure about the love they feel.

Some people will be very angry at their mate and tell me all the things the partner does to make them pull their hair out. Then I ask the same person, “Do you think about ending the relationship?” Then they scold me as if I haven’t been listening and then they tell me, “I can’t leave, I love him.”

Many people struggle with taking responsibility in a relationship. They feel victimized, they blame, and they feel miserable. It doesn’t have to be this way.

One of the hardest things I see couples struggle with is the idea that each person in the relationship is responsible for his or her own part of the problems that surround them. It’s not uncommon for people to want to blame the other person for how they feel as if the partner did something to cause the upset. Something bad happens and people start pointing fingers at the other person.

Getting our partners to make changes is probably one of the hardest parts of being in a relationship. It certainly is the number one issue people talk about when they come to see me for counseling. So why is it so hard to get what we want from the people who are supposed to love us?

First off, no one plans to have a disagreement with the person they love. We love who we love and we want to be in harmony with them. So why is it so hard for many of us to stop fighting in a relationship? Why is it that the fights pretty much determine whether a relationship will last or not?

People come to me saying, “My husband blames me for everything,” or “My wife blames me for everything.” Here’s a look at why people look to blame another when they feel hurt.

Many of us automatically look for someone to blame when we get mad. This is very common; humans often look for someone to take responsibility when something bad happens. So what’s wrong with blaming another person when we get upset? If a lot of people do this why even talk about it?

Well, people get defensive, they get mad, and they fight. They don’t have to. Learn how to break the pattern.

3 Ways to Stop the Bleeding In Your Relationship

How many of us sometimes wonder why we have to suffer in our relationships? As a Marriage and Family Therapist who specializes in couples I can affirm that most of my clients often wonder this very question. They wonder if they can ever avoid difficulties in their relationship and feel better with the person they love.

Here are three ways you can decrease your suffering and increase your happiness…

Sometimes I Just Don’t Feel Loved by my Mate

One of the most common problems faced by couples who feel distant from each other is not knowing if they are loved by their mate. This sounds so simple yet can be the source of enormous pain and misunderstandings. Everyone wants to feel loved, so why is it sometimes so hard for people in a relationship to feel like they belong?

Tag Archives: blame

It’s Never Too Late to Improve Your Relationship

Annoying Girlfriend, Boyfriend, or Spouse Driving You Crazy?

Positive Communication in Marriage for Happier Relationships

What Does Love Feel Like?

How Taking Responsibility in a Relationship Brings Peace

Why It’s So Hard to Change Your Spouse’s Behavior

How to Stop Fighting In a Relationship, and Simply Love

My Husband / Wife Blames Me for Everything! What Do I Do?

3 Ways to Stop the Bleeding In Your Relationship

Sometimes I Just Don’t Feel Loved by my Mate