I was recently at a going away party for a dear friend who is moving away. It was a lively affair with food and wine and upbeat conversation. But the highlight of the evening was a gathering in a large comfortable room where we read or spoke our feelings about the person who is leaving. Our readings or poems were then put in a binder for the departed one to keep—a sort of “Memory Book”.
We Touch Many Hearts
I knew this person because we have both been in a group that meets once a week. She and I have seen each other in this group for the last 15 years. Yes, I feel I know her. She has touched my life in several ways and I am grateful to have experienced this closeness.
There were about 60 people at the party, but only a third was from my group. When the people I didn’t know stood up and talked about my friend—and how deeply they felt connected to her and how she influenced them—I was amazed. You see, I had been living inside my own thoughts about how I love this person. I didn’t know that dozens of other people felt similar toward my person. I had not seen this or been aware of it before.
It’s Easy to Forget That We’re Loved
I had felt like I was the only one to have this deep friendship with her, but that night there were dozens of others who felt that closeness too. As I thought about this I was thinking about all of us in relationships and when we are having a difficult time. It’s so easy for all of us to think we are unloved.
In fact, sometimes in the past when I talked to this dear friend and heard her cry I know she too wondered if she was loved. And then there is the reality, a room full of people telling such beautiful stories and sharing enough love to last a life time.
We Are All Loved
So here’s what I think. We are all loved. Loved by the people we love. If it was our goodbye party they would all be there standing up and telling us what we meant to them and how much they love us. But we forget this. We forget that we are loved by our people. We forget that we are loved by our mate.
If your special person stood up in a room and talked about you because you were leaving I bet you would hear beautiful heartfelt words that would make you cry. Sometimes we just have to believe we are loved deeply. At that party with dozens of people professing love, I know that is the truth of our lives. People love us. Find a way to remember.
Remember That You’re Loved
Read a Book About Relationships
Can’t make it on Monday? If you’d like some help feeling loved and making your partner feel loved too, try reading Linda’s book, Safe. Happy. Loved. Simple Skills for Your Relationship. It might just help you feel warmer and more connected than ever. Give it a read.
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