Overweight couples may suffer in their relationships.  If both people in a couple are overweight there may be some bonding and support from each other, and this can be nuturing.  If you stay isolated from the rest of the world this would probably be O.K.  But we all live in some sort of community and overweight people are often subjected to taunts, discrimination and rejection.  These issues can lead to feelings of low self esteem, shame and depression.

Overweight couples may also suffer from feelings of failure.  It’s likely both people have tried to lose weight in the past.  Maybe they have and recall a time when they felt good about themselves.  Now that picture, or time in the past, can become the enemy as they hold it up to themselves as a measure for their happiness. “If I could only be that size again, my life would be O.K.”  When we struggle to attain a desired weight, or look, we suffer with feelings of sadness and disappointment if we don’t succeed.  We might even get annoyed or angry at ourselves for not being able to complete a goal.

Often, eating is a way to soothe hurt feelings.  Food tastes good.  Eating feels good.  Sometimes people eat when they are sad.  People also might find themselves eating out of boredom.  Maybe you are angry.  This is another feeling that could lead to overeating.

Once you get to a point where you would like to make some changes in your life, why not consider investigating your situation from a different angle.  An important step to understanding your eating habits might begin with a therapist.  In a therapy session it’s possible to uncover deep feelings we hold about ourselves.  Often it’s these feelings tied to messages we tell ourselves that guide us to food and overeating.  Understanding how we think about ourselves is a great place to start as you travel on your road of health.

People who suffer with food issues may want to live differently.  Looking inside ones’ thoughts and feelings for answers is one way to shift a person’s thinking.  As individuals we all share the capacity for introspection.  Why not give yourself a chance for a new you?  You are worth it.

Send your comments to linda@lindanusbaum.com

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