Couples trying to work out problems often feel stuck. They get derailed by the pain sitting between them, and that pain just doesn’t seem to go away. It’s not they don’t want to get closer; the pain stymies them. If one or both carry around deep pain, how can the couple get around it and get together?
Getting into disagreements with our mate is not only part of being in a relationship; it’s also a part of life. Staying mad at your partner over unresolved issues is also pretty common, and it takes a toll on everyone. Do you stay mad at your partner?
If you are holding a grudge against him or her you are not alone. As a couples counselor I see couples in all stages of the relationship. Sometimes they come in and they are really mad at the other person. Sometimes it’s one person who does the yelling or scolding while the other just smolders and steams.